The Art of Life
Photobucket I'm so glad you're here! "The Art of Life" is where I share my journey as an artist & Momma. It's a place where I hope to encourage other women that they are artists too. In this small little space I seek to share, document, and be reminded of God's wonderful grace, all around us. ....And I would be so happy to have you journey alongside me! So grab a cup of coffee and linger for a while. I hope you leave feeling refreshed. Photobucket

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

Overwhelm and Rest

~~Wow! I am alive!
~~It happens to me every year. Somewhere around the middle of November I wake up and realize that I have so much to do!
Christmas shopping,
Sierra's birthday,
school parties,
work parties,
Church parties,
Christmas cards to order,
cookies to bake.....
and the list goes on!
~~I love this time of year but I have a personality problem; Overwhelm.
I'm not a multi-tasker. Ask my dear husband and he will confirm. When I try to do too much or even think about too much my brain short circuits. (Please tell me that I'm not the only one!)
My coping method tends to be backing myself into a corner and procrastinating.
Sigh. Not good.
~~Lately I've been convicted that my overwhelm and stress is something much deeper than just a personality trait. Our pastor has been doing a wonderful series on idolatry and I've come to see that my big idols are; "perfectionism" and "fear of what others think."
Christmas tends to bring those traits out in overdrive.
~~I've been doing a lot of praying, reading and journaling and it has been a great help. Sometimes I just need the reminder to stop, calm down, and turn to the One who has it all in His hands anyway. What great peace there is when I stop trying to do it all alone! (And perfectly no less!)
~~Which brings me back to blogging. Somehow I realized that I've been missing out on a lot of joy because I've lost touch with what is truly important to me and my life. My days have been looking like endless "to-do" lists filled with "have-to's" instead of "want-to's." Even the things that I enjoy, like blogging, started to feel like just another "have-to" on my list;
another opportunity to let people down.
~~Plus, there's the whole other issue of "blog overwhelm." I love to read blogs and have a pretty long list in my Google Reader. But after a while it's easy to forget that a blog is just a tiny snippet of someone's life and not the entire picture.
You start to compare yourself to others and wonder why you can't seem to get it all together like they do.
You know;
that blog of the lady who

has a successful art business,
a beautifully decorated home,
an organized blog with perfect pictures,
AND still finds time to finger-paint with her children?
Well, it goes from being an inspiration to a guilt-inducing whack on the head.
I start to wonder; "What's wrong with me? Why can't I do that? Why do I struggle so much?"
My sweet husband reminded me, "You don't know the behind-the-scenes."
So very true.
~~So, I've coped with blogging in the same way I do everything else; retreat!
~~But I'm coming to the place where I don't want to retreat anymore. Instead I'm praying for the strength and wisdom to live authentically.
*To say "yes" to things that bring true joy
*And to learn to say "no" when necessary.
*To quit stretching myself so thin and ask for help when I need it.
*To replace my fear and "other's expectations" with the realization that the only One I need to please is my Saviour.
*To let go of perfectionism and accept that imperfect is perfectly acceptable.

~~I've been reading the book "Do You Think I'm Beautiful" by Angela Thomas and it has been feeding my heart. In the book Angela says;
"Do you remember the Pigpen character in the Peanuts comic strip? Pigpen is surrounded by a cloud of dust everywhere he goes. That's me-just dust. So dusty, in fact, that I take the cloud with me everywhere I go. So human. So prone to go forward and then turn around and move backward. I get it some days and forget it on others. Thank goodness that God remembers that I am just dust. His grace covers my inadequacies. His compassion waits patiently. His forgiveness removes my transgressions. He does not treat me as I deserve."
~Wow. There is the peace. There is the rest.
And I am learning.


Belinda Lindhardt said...

Hi Kasie, I hear you, i do exactly the same thing, i think recently i have found some salvation tho ! Have you read the book Getting things done by David Allen. Its aimed at business in one way but its alot about your overall life, i have been overwhelmed with all that i have to do but after listening to his audio i feel relaxed in the thoughts that i have a system that with capture and i will get to all that i need to do :)

just thought i would suggest it .. it has helped me :) ... take care of yourself and your family and remember to enjoy it... i know i havent been but i hope to enjoy them more in the future :)

Merry Christmas if i dont speak to you for you and your family :)

Kris said...

I'm starting to feel overwhelmed too. I have bought like one Chirstmas gift ;)

I'm with you on being a perfectionist! I wish I wasn't that way sometimes, but in the end I believe it is a good trait. It makes us always do our best :)

Valerie Jones said...


I appreciated this post and your honesty. And, yes, I short circuit too when life gets hectic. And, yes, I procrastinate too until the LAST minute. Take care of yourself! Go sit and drink a cup of coffee....relax.....breathe deep....feel the stress melt away, if only for a moment. (((HUGS)))

Misti said...

i've been wondering about you. I figured you were insanely busy. ;) If it makes you feel any better, I look up to you a lot in the way you live your life! So, please don't feel bad about yourself!

Jo Castillo said...

I think we all tend to compare ourselves to others. It is really something I try to get over, but it is hard. I do it mostly in art as I am older and wiser (ha) about personal things, like house, job, etc. But I often think about why my art doesn't sell like a friends or some such. It is me and I should realize that many people like it and it is like my handwriting.. it makes me different. I do procrastinate though and that is my worst trait. So I work on that and try to believe in the things I do well. :) You are amazing and do so much for your young family. Enjoy them now. They grow up quickly. Hugs...